Back, but not Forgiven
by Starry-eyed Fanboy
Summary: You growl at him and jump backwards when he tries to hug you, you hate this boy to the depths of your heart and hope he realizes that. He looks hurt, and you smile internally at that. Let him hurt. Let him feel what I felt. / One of the many ways Vio and Shadow see each other again. I don't even know what to rate this... / happy ending? Mostly it's just monologuing and screaming


**i got this idea and it didnt leave and**

 **help**

You can't believe it. A year an two months and you've finally found it.

You chant the last portion of the spell, staring at the dried blood in the center of the room. It's your blood.

All those weeks spent working in the library, Red hounding you to eat or sleep in your own bed, falling asleep over open books and letting yourself drown in magic spells and runes... it's all finally paying off, you found a foolproof way to get him back. Zelda warned you that blood spells have side effects, but all angles say this spell should work, he's coming back and you're infinitely happy.

You remember most everything from your time together. You remember the first time you finally got comfortable with each other, the few times he had a little too much to drink and said and did stupid things and you laughed and scolded him, the seemingly infinite times you almost kissed but chickened out far too early. You remember the lingering touches of wrists or hands, all the things you went through together and all the raids you accompanied him on. He was a bad person at the time, but you think you changed him. You can't wait another minute for the spell to work, you're so excited ot see him.

You bet he is too.

Suddenly, he materializes. The floor turns an inky black and he appears out of it, looking for a moment confused and dazed. The next few seconds he blinks, then looks around and sees you. You grin, tears beginning to form on your eyelashes, and walk quickly towards him. It's the happiest you've been in more than a year, and you're both so happy to see each other-

You get close, and Shadow lets loose a snarl and jumps out of the way.

* * *

You appear from nothing. Maybe you were the nothing. All you know is that you've been sitting on your emotions for too long and they've gone bad.

You remember him. Oh boy, do you. You can't think of anything but.

You remember that you were hopelessly in love from the first time you saw him. He looked so _different,_ he looked like he wouldn't use you like Vaati had been, he looked new and refreshing and so perfect that it happened subconsciously and completely by accident. You recruited him to your side with ease, appealing to his weak spots and immediately leading him into your trap.

He was the person you wanted, but you could tell from day one that he wasn't the person you needed. He had multiple fronts and it took you days to get past them - and you knew they'd go back up in an instant if you did anything to wring him or he you. He acted sort of off, acted like a good guy trying to fit in with evil (which is what he was, but you thought differently at the time). There was always something just out of your vision that you couldn't see, and it made you feel uneasy.

It did nothing to quench how much you liked him though. You were clingy, never leaving his side if you could help it, asking to take him everywhere and making everyone treat him with respect. You hugged him a lot, and he didn't respond at first but gradually returned them. Once, after drinking too much, you tried to kiss him and you know he tried to kiss you back before thinking twice and pulling away. Incidents like that happened all the time, but you'd never actually kissed.

So yeah, you were basically a pining dork. You're proud of it.

Actually, that's a lie. There might have been good times, but all the good times are infinitely outweighed by the bad times. He ratted you out to Vaati (he says it was an accident; you doubt it) when you didn't do your job correctly, he never covered for you even though you covered for him, and he even had the nerve to betray you.

Your only friend, your almost-more-than-a-friend, had thrown in the hammer (quite literally) and left you. You never forgave him. You can't. The wounds he inflicted on your heart are too deep, your trust has been broken and you can't piece it together again. He broke your heart, he broke you for a while and he never apologized. He was there when you died, after you became good, and in that moment you acted like everything was fine because you were too tired and dead to do otherwise. But you didn't side with Vio because Vio was on that side. You sided with Vio because of Zelda, and being allies does nothing to change your bitterness towards him.

That's all you are, really - you're a writhing mass of anger and bitterness and sadness and love, all for one stupid light-worlder.

And now he's in front of you.

He looks happy. Immensely so - you can see him tearing up. But that doesn't register in your mind, all that registers is

 _traitor._ You growl at him and jump backwards when he tries to hug you, you hate this boy to the depths of your heart and hope he realizes that. He looks hurt, and you smile internally at that. Let him hurt. Let him feel what I felt. You both stand there, Vio's arms dropping by his sides, and you keep yours up, crouching slightly, ready to run away at the slightest movement towards you.

He doesn't move, but he whispers. "Shadow, I-"

"Shut up!" You yell, over him. He doesn't deserve to speak in such an even tone when just looking at him makes your insides writhe. "Shut up! Do you know what you put me through? You killed me! You broke me! You don't deserve to be around me. You don't deserve to be so calm, you don't deserve to touch me after what you did." He opens his mouth to speak again, but you're not done. You can see the pain in his eyes and it fuels your fire. "No! You deserve to hurt. I want you to feel the pain I'm giving you, and I want you to realize that's what you did to ME!"

Before he can do anything, you fall into the shadows and dash away as fast as your new legs can carry you. You think Red sees you as you steal rupees from the jar in the kitchen, but he doesn't say anything before you're zipping away again.

You re-materialize outside of the town, take a walk through the woods and fight every urge you have to set the place ablaze.

* * *

It's been three weeks since Shadow was brought back, and since then you've told the others and they've told Zelda. No one has seen him, but he has a room ready in the castle next to Green and Red's and you've been on edge every day.

You started thinking about it. You realize that you really did do awful things to him, and they affected him much more so than you. You never thought about how different his experience was while you were with him - and it's a lot more full of betrayal than you thought. You feel terrible.

One day you hear shouting from Green's room. It's Shadow.

Green is confused - why not show up to Vio first? Shadow yells back that he can't be around you, and Green tells him to calm down, but the shouting dies down after that so you assume he went to his room. Through the wall. His shadowy powers are kinda cool, if inconvenient. Green walks out and sees you, but he doesn't say anything - just gives a sympathetic look.

After that, you see Shadow sometimes. He avoids you and you avoid him, and you guess that's how it should be. You accept that he's not ready to face you, especially now that you understand how you must have hurt him. Being on the receiving end of anything is always worse than the giving end. Sometimes you walk into a room and the other boy leaves immediately, other times you pass each other in the hallways and you'd act like you forgot something and would run away.

It takes months for you to get used to each other, or maybe just that long for Shadow to realize he needs to stop being so bitter, and you finally walk into a room and sit next to him. You open your mouth to speak, and he doesn't even spare you a glance.

"I'm not going to apologize yet - I know it won't help," you start, and Shadow seems to realize you've been thinking about his side of things and looks at you. "but we need to start somewhere, we can't stay like this forever."

The darker-clothed boy sighs in relief - you can't pinpoint exactly why - and smiles, small but full of emotion, and says quietly "Can't believe it took you that long to come around."

 **I might add on to this later but right now its just this**

 **I wrote this as a vent so it doesn't make too much sense, but it's one of the many many MANY reactions they could have to each other coming back. And also one of the many ways Shadow spends his time in between, and one of the many ways Vio actually brings him back. There's a lot of ways and I think all of them need to be written at some point rip**

 **Anyways yea if you want more dumb add-on to this lemme know bye**

 **-Starr**


End file.
